Mean Machine

2001 "It's Not Just About Football, It's About Pride Inside!"
6.4| 1h39m| R| en| More Info
Released: 26 December 2001 Released
Producted By: SKA Films
Country: United Kingdom
Budget: 0
Revenue: 0
Official Website:
Info

Disgraced ex-England football captain, Danny 'Mean Machine' Meehan, is thrown in jail for assaulting two police officers. He keeps his head down and has the opportunity to forget everything and change the lives of the prisoners. When these prisoners have the chance to put one over the evil guards during a prison football match, Danny takes the lead.

Genre

Drama, Comedy

Watch Online

Mean Machine (2001) is now streaming with subscription on Paramount+

Director

Barry Skolnick

Production Companies

SKA Films

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Mean Machine Audience Reviews

Kidskycom It's funny watching the elements come together in this complicated scam. On one hand, the set-up isn't quite as complex as it seems, but there's an easy sense of fun in every exchange.
Mischa Redfern I didn’t really have many expectations going into the movie (good or bad), but I actually really enjoyed it. I really liked the characters and the banter between them.
Keeley Coleman The thing I enjoyed most about the film is the fact that it doesn't shy away from being a super-sized-cliche;
Payno I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.
SnoopyStyle Disgraced ex-captain of England football team Danny 'Mean Machine' Meehan (Vinnie Jones) is thrown in prison for drunkenly assaulting two police officers. Guard Burton tells him that the governor will offer him the job to coach the prison wardens' football team. His men beats him up telling him not to take the job. Lots of prisoners are angry that he threw a game. He befriends smuggler Massive and elderly Doc. He takes on coaching the prisoner's football team with maximum-security prisoner Monk (Jason Statham).Unlike its American cousins, the humor is not the simple, easy, broad kind. It tries to be darker, energetic grittiness. It's not quite that and it's not quite funny either. This definitely has the Guy Ritchie flavor but director Barry Skolnick doesn't have the same skill level. I would have liked to see Ritchie do the directing himself.
slightlymad22 As a fan of the original Burt Reynolds movie, I had mixed feelings about this movie. On one side as a traditional football (soccer) fan and not a fan of American football, I though I'd get more enjoyment out of it. On the other side I love the original movie so much it would obviously suffer in comparison, and let's be honest Vinnie Jones is no Burt Reynolds. Plot In A Paragraph: A disgraced former footballer is sent to jail for three years for drunkenly assaulting a police officer. Once there the Warden wants him to train the guards football team, he refuses, after a while he agrees to play in, and coach a team of cons to play the gaurds in a one off match.Whilst not as enjoyable as the Burt Reynolds version, it is a lot of fun with Jason Statham stealing the show as The Monk!! While Danny Dyer gets a lot of laughs, likewise Vas Blackwood as Massive and David Kelly is touching as Doc.
Jackson Booth-Millard I knew this title mainly because of the lead actor, and that it had football involved somewhere, so I watched it. Basically ex-England football captain Danny 'Mean Machine' Meehan (Vinnie Jones) is in jail for drunken driving and assault on two police officers, but because of his celebrity status he isn't much liked by all the other inmates, especially as he let them down in a crucial World Cup game. He keeps his head down for a little while until the opportunity to change the lives of the prisoners by putting one over on the guards. Led by Danny, the prisoners are trained ready to face the guards in a football match. So it comes to the match, and not even the death of Doc (David Kelly) gets them down, and they start really well. There is a point when Danny is threatened by the Governor (David Hemmings) that he could get a longer sentence, as he might have been involved in Doc's death, but he knows they have to win, and it is after they win that opponent Burton (Cape Wrath's Ralph Brown) gets him out of trouble to enjoy victory. Also starring Creep's Vas Blackwood as Massive, Robbie Gee as Trojan, Geoff Bell as Ratchett, Footballer's Wives' John Forgeham as Charlie Sykes, Smack the Pon's Sally Phillips as Tracey, Danny Dyer as Billy the Limpet, Jason Statham as Monk, Omid Djalili as Raj and Jason Flemyng as Bob Likely. Jones is a good rough character, and all the supporting actors, particularly Hemmings, Sykes and Statham add good support, while it takes a little while to get to, the football game, well, and maybe a little of the training for it, is fun to watch, a real boys movie. Good!
sovvolf Mean Machine is a remake that keeps at least some sense of originality by sending the movie to America's older Cousine (UK) and switching the sport from American football to the original football give the movie a twist rather than a straight sh*te remake (the longest yard 2005). The good of this movie is that Vinnie Jones actually looks the part rather than Adam Saddler who doesn't look owt like a AF player. One thing to add is that rugby and American football is all about fouling and ramming normal football isn't so to get a voilent movie out of football takes alittle imagination rather than AFnote that not only is it funny, dark ,violent and dramatic it as the Monk (jason statham) a true phycopath that ''hate Hannibal the cannibal'' who's not only scary but funny and believable rather than the one in the remake of the longest yard who really just looks like a dopey inbred played by a wrestler ( who can't act)over all I rate this movie 10/10 witch is overrated but i want to give this movie some credit....A remake of an American classic turns into a British classic