Sarita Rafferty
There are moments that feel comical, some horrific, and some downright inspiring but the tonal shifts hardly matter as the end results come to a film that's perfect for this time.
Woodyanders
Offering up five zombie-themed horror stories told from a female point of view, this omnibus outing sounds promising on paper. Unfortunately, the distaff sensibility found herein primarily entails a teeming surplus of tedious and highly irritating squabbling amongst a bunch of excruciatingly shrill, shallow, and bitchy women. The first tale "Dweezle" gets things off to a cruddy start: Dull and talky, this one has insipid characters, tacky CGI blood, zero tension, and a limp and predictable climax. The second segment "A Picture To Die For" rates as a slight improvement thanks to the gorgeous black and white cinematography and spooky cemetery setting, but once again the routine plot stops it from scoring a bull's eye. The third yarn "Black Bone Woods" suffers from tiresome bickering and unlikable characters, yet overall sizes up as an okay affair because of a decent plot twist and a reasonable amount of suspense. The fourth story "Zoe Dies in the Mind" ain't much to get excited about: Yet again the by-the-numbers predictable narrative and the two obnoxious main characters doom this honey to mediocrity. Only the fifth and final tale "Here Lies Bub" manages to make a favorable impression: Tense and moody, this one benefits from strong acting, tolerable characters, a gripping central dilemma, and an uncompromisingly grim and even poignant ending. The fact that the zombies look like guys in hokey rubber dimestore Halloween masks certainly doesn't help matters any. The alarming lack of a wraparound story counts as another significant flaw; there's no connective narrative tissue to provide a sense of much-needed cohesion and continuity. A real wash-out.
