Solidrariol Am I Missing Something?

Doomtomylo a film so unique, intoxicating and bizarre that it not only demands another viewing, but is also forgivable as a satirical comedy where the jokes eventually take the back seat.

Ariella Broughton It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.

Philippa All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

innocuous No, this isn't a good movie and it only fulfills its purpose for existence by serving as MST3K fodder.Buuutt...you gotta love the hand-puppet dinosaurs shot in forced perspective. Also, the cardboard TV news camera is ALMOST as funny as the pilots' controls in "Plan 9 from Outer Space". And the clincher has to be the Los Angeles drainage system, with wood slat walls and the most amazing plumbing job you've ever seen. (I would have given them an extra star just for putting together all that pipe, but I can't be sure that they did the work themselves.) Perhaps I'm just getting too old and I dislike current CGI FX too much, but I have to tell you that I liked the dinosaur FX in this film better than the truly cheap and tacky FX in the more recent "Zombieland". (And just how do all the fanboys put up with CGI crap like that? Are their brain melted from too many game sessions? Is this what people are readily accepting nowadays?) OK, anyway...this won't be for everyone, but it is a pretty funny film in its own right, even before MST3K got hold of it. (And the hooker-turned-nun who swears like a sailor is also pretty funny.)

KrakatoaEnt317 Terminator meets Jurassic Park? Wow, That's a horrible combination. Shot in 1994 but not released until 1997.... Really? I wonder why? The most recently released film to ever be featured on the TV series "Mystery Science Theater 3000" . Not surprised at all.... Directed by Visual & Special Effects artist Anthony Doublin (From Beyond, Bride of Re-Animator, Team America, The Blob (88), Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat, Tales from the Darkside: The Movie, & Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man). You would think someone who has worked on quality films like these would have a decent film himself but then you would be wrong. Then again it's happened before John Carl Buechler comes to be mind he has directed some really good stuff like Troll & Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood but the rest of his filmography is rather poor but besides that he's one of the best Fx guys ever so I guess that logic goes to crap. Most of the supporting cast is god awful & this has some of the worst set pieces in film history. Yes there are a few decent fight scenes & some good action but the problem is a lot of it is done in an abandoned warehouse full of boxes. Yes FULL OF BOXES, how lame is that? This film had so many boxes featured in that someone actually got credit as an "box wrangler" what a joke! Since the director is a Visual & Special Effects artist those were good for the most part except the Dinosaurs looked pretty bad but I've seen worse. The only reason I wanted to see this piece of crap was because the two top billing stars Daniel Bernhardt (Bloodsport 2/3/4, Perfect Target, Mortal Kombat: Conquest, Matrix Reloaded, & The Cutter) & Robert Z'Dar (Maniac Cop Trilogy, Night Stalker, Tango & Cash, Mobsters, & Beastmaster 2) who is only in the film for about 8 minutes. Stay away from this.

garyb04 I first saw this piece of crap on MST3K when it was on Sci-fi channel and I couldn't believe what I saw because it's so bad.How bad?? Well,the acting for one.Second,the so-called effects because the dinosaurs are smaller than they actually are.Third,the script...I have a question:why do the nun and Runaway get on the train after the dinosaur attacks them and the others at their house??? Did anyone notice that there's a cardboard box factory during the fight between the cyborg and Runaway??Nothing but empty boxes..I wouldn't advise anyone to watch this by itself.Please only watch it with Mike and bots and that's it,then it won't be so painful.Not unless you're into that kind of thing..Fun to watch?? Maybe.Painful? Could be.Really bad??? Definitely!!!!

Torgo_Approves (r#18)Where to begin? Not only is this film incompetently made on all levels, it is also so pathetically boring you'll lose whatever will you once had to live before you've gotten through half of it. In fact, I'm writing this review as I'm watching the movie because frankly, it's the only way to keep my sanity.There isn't much of a war in here... or a plot... but we do get to see exploding plastic dinosaurs, Emo cyborgs with poodle haircuts, fat hicks galore, inexplicable flashbacks, the worst narration you're ever likely to hear (well, anything that sellout Morgan Freeman does might be worse, I don't know), bad actors (but come on, that's a given), and Charlie Sheen as police officer Polaris. Just kidding. They got a look-a-like instead. Not even Charlie Sheen wanted to star in this garbage. Even the man who sprouted a huge boner in Scary Movie 4 has the right to SOME dignity.Boxes. I forgot about boxes. This movie has a perverse fascination with those bland-looking cardboard boxes that illegal Polish TV sets come in. You know, the kind that Calvin and Hobbes would play time travel in. Ironically their toy dinosaurs are more convincing than the toy dinosaurs in Future War.Jesus, when will this movie end...? I mean, I'm watching it with Mike and the 'bots, and I STILL find it hard to concentrate. I've sat through 'Manos', Night Train, and Secret Agent Super Dragon. I've made it through the awful excuse for a comedy "Spöket på Bragehus", for crying out loud! Um... no, wait, I actually fell asleep during that film. Anyway, my point is that Future War has to be one of the most offensively dull movies ever made. Well, gotta go watch the fat guys fight dinosaurs again. See you around. This movie might have some amazing twist ending that will bring its rating up a few notches, but I doubt it.Edit: Surprise... it didn't.