Karry
Best movie of this year hands down!
Pacionsbo
Absolutely Fantastic
Beystiman
It's fun, it's light, [but] it has a hard time when its tries to get heavy.
Voxitype
Good films always raise compelling questions, whether the format is fiction or documentary fact.
Vomitron_G
Holy Macaronial Crap!!!"BONES OF CRAP"!"CROSSCRAP"!"ARR, ARR, CRAP IN ME PIRATE PANTS"!These all would have been more appropriate titles for the abominable 'movie' that is called CROSSBONES!When looking for 'first time viewings' for the annual Octobre Horror Movie Challenge here on the IMDb horror-board, I had the misfortune of stumbling upon this extremely lame and idiotic crap-fest. And I now officially have my number 1 Worst Horror movie of the New Millennium! And mind you, I never, ever have used the term 'worst horror movie...'. I always carefully used the phrase "One of the worst...".Anyway, after having seen this pirate/horror/reality-TV crap-fest, I immediately added one extra point to the first movie I saw during that month for the Challenge, namely BLOODY PIT OF HORROR (aka IL BOIA SCARLATTO). I don't care if that one's made in the 60's or that it's not comparable in any way with CrapBones. At least I had a lot of fun with BLOODY PIT OF HORROR. Hell, it's even a better movie...In fact, after having seen CrapBones I might as well go back to my reviews and add one extra point to ALL bad & crappy movies I've seen so far. Because none of them was as bad as this one... Well, maybe some... For the ones who know their more recent bad-movie-stuff: SKELETON MAN (that Casper Van Dien crap-fest) is almost Oscar material compared to CRAPBONES. Almost, I said...I will not even dedicate more time to going into full details of this movie (because really, it's not worth it), but here's another 'aka' title:CARIBBEAN CRAP!Hmmm... I wonder if I might have over-used the word "crap" just a little bit in this comment...?**UPDATE** Please forget that "worst horror movie"-statement I made about CROSSBONES. I recently saw DEMON SUMMER and DA HIP HOP WITCH. And, yes, they're even worse. That just shows you can't be sure of anything anymore these days...
drosz22
sorry guys, someone loaned me this on and I honestly have to say that it is pretty unwatchable. the story seemed like a relatively good (albeit somewhat tired) "reality" show horror movie crossover, then quickly eroded. I have posted spoiler alerts, but for those of you that missed it at the top.... SPOILER ALERT!!!!!! it takes 52 minutes (the film is 88 minutes total), yes 52 minutes for the first kill!!!!!!! WTF?????? I could have watched a third of POCII before anyone got "slaughtered" in this movie.... the pirate kills don't count at the beginning, because that is somewhat not pertinent to the modern day story. the effects.... what effects???? they were talking about this "undead" pirate being all chewed up, yet he looked the same from 150 years ago. and the red-headed "native" girl from the beginning? HA!!!! it's supposed to be 1841 and she has implants! BRILLIANT!!!!!! this movie had me laughing when the Spanish pirate talks with the stereotypical English "pirate" accent. this movie was nothing short of a train wreck, but hey..... they achieved what they were striving for and got it to LGF!!!!!!! YEARRRRGH!!!!!!! this treasure should have stayed buried!
dezid_88
the cover was misleading. i thought i was going to watch a film were i would be entertained and thrilled... but no, i got to see boobs and bad acting. now if one can stand acting that would not even be cast in a first grade play, then you may like it. but honestly i don't think anyone not under the influence of something would enjoy this movie, and if so, I'm sorry for the people who had to be in the room at the time it was playing So if you haven't seen it, don't, for your sake and anybody else who would see it. for anyone who has seen it, i know how hard it was to watch it, and just think it cant get any worse, and if it dose...... God help us!
praetoria
Comparing this movie to anything else made ever is an insult to whatever you are comparing it to. If you have ever wondered what reality show people searching for fame do once their 15 minutes are over, this is it. It stars a few reality show rejects (Hardy from Big Brother, some Temptation Island girl, and some Survivor girl).One of the sub plots of this "movie" was a girl sleeping with a reality show producer to win a show. Is it possible this hits a little close to home? The only way I can figure it, is someone sucked her way up Lion Gates Films to get this distributed through them. I can not stress how bad this movie was.The film looks like it was shot with VHS camcorders from the 70s. Make up consists of clown make up and a pirate costume. Special effects (if you can call them that) consist of stabbing three feet to the right of the target and then thrashing in the water with Kool Aid.The "actors" took themselves so seriously, that you can't help but laugh. All of the camera angles focus on T&A and every scene you expect them to end in an orgy. This should have been a STV soft porn, but in the end it ended up being a big tease.The budget for this movie must have been in the 10s of dollars. Avoid at all costs.
